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Throwaway comments can do widespread damage during divorce

In the context of the legal world, there is no doubt that lying can create far more trouble for an individual than the truth. Emotionally, the truth can be a complex issue as individuals can perceive the exact same incidents with wildly differing views. For couples going through the divorce process in California, it may sometimes be worth considering the potentially far-reaching consequences of opinions and feelings one is moved to express verbally.

Dismissive comments can be easily made to a child, or at least within their hearing range. For example, hinting at, or stating outright, an ill-considered or negative opinion about the other parent's relationship with the child can cause much unnecessary distress. At some point, a worried child may feel moved to ask the other parent if these comments are true, in an effort to gain reassurance that they are loved and cared about.

If the comments are also open to being interpreted as unjust and possibly malicious, this could provide an unfavorable impression of one's behavior. The individual who has been maligned may be able to use that to their own advantage, showing the other parent as intentionally trying to alienate the child from them. This would in turn most likely result in further acrimony between the parties to the divorce.

When possible, it is advisable to keep one's personal feelings toward the other parent away from the children involved. This may not only reduce the distress for the child, it may also assist one's own case for remaining involved with the child's future. If a California resident has genuine misgivings about allowing the other parent to remain in contact following a divorce, then it would be advisable to get the appropriate advice on the measures and rights one may have available to them.

Source: The Huffington Post, "To the Mother That Told Her Son This...", Marina Sbrochi, May 3, 2014

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